Graduation picture

I DID IT!!! 🥰

I thought that posting an update on the eve of my 43rd birthday would be apropos. Since my last post, I have reached yet another goal--perhaps the biggest of my life thus far. Are you ready for it.....drumroll please...a little louder for those in the back:

I GOT MY MASTERS DEGREE!!! I graduated on December 4th with a masters in social work. I am reposting my FB status update below and also sharing a picture of myself taken on the big day.

Okay folks, this is going to be a long one so don't say you weren't warned!!!

As many of you know, I graduated on Saturday with my masters of social work from the University of Pittsburgh School of Social Work. I am not one to toot my own horn but not only did I graduate but I graduated with a 4.0. To say that this has been a long and arduous journey would be an understatement. The perseverance and sheer effort this required exceeded what I thought I was capable of. 

You see, I have never believed in myself. 

After being bullied extensively throughout grade school, I didn't believe in myself. 

After dropping out of college at age 18 two weeks into my first semester, I didn't believe in myself. 

Getting married at age 22 to someone I had only known for 6 weeks, I didn't believe in myself. 

Moving back in with my parents at age 29 after my first divorce, I didn't believe in myself. 

Being in a toxic relationship with a narcissist, I didn't believe in myself. Laying on the ground bleeding and looking up at a police officer who I couldn't see because my glasses were broken after my 'fiancé' pushed me off a scaffolding, I didn't believe in myself. 

Becoming pregnant only to discover that my baby had no heartbeat, I didn't believe in myself. 

Ending a toxic relationship and immediately starting another one, I didn't believe in myself. 

Getting married for a second time at age 32 to someone I had only known for 5 months, I didn't believe in myself. 

Becoming pregnant a second time only to be told after 29 weeks that once again my baby had no heartbeat, I didn't believe in myself. 

Having to go through labor and deliver my baby boy who was already in Heaven, I didn't believe in myself. 

Attending the funeral of my baby boy, I didn't believe in myself. 

Facing the weeks and months ahead after his death by engaging in every self-destructive behavior I could, I didn't believe in myself. 

Becoming pregnant a third time and delivering my baby boy 9 weeks early, I didn't believe in myself. 

Weighing almost 300 pounds with limited education, no job, and a controlling husband, I didn't believe in myself. 

Getting divorced a second time while attempting 'dating' and 'co-parenting', I didn't believe in myself. 

Earning a bachelor's degree in psychology and landing my first job in the field as a blended case manager, I didn't believe in myself. 

Leaving said job after almost 2 years due to an abusive and sadistic boss, I didn't believe in myself. 

Landing another job as a drug and alcohol therapist with my very own office, I didn't believe in myself.

Guess what? I believe in myself now. Not only did I earn more letters after my name, I learned who I truly was and all that I was capable of. I learned that in spite of always thinking I was broken because of all that I had been through, I was in fact stronger and more resilient than I ever knew. Never give up and believe in yourself even if others around you do not. Chase your dreams because I promise you, if you work hard and do your best, you will achieve your goals. 

Signed,

Lisa Marie Cook, BS, CADC, MSW

4 years sober!!!

Today marks 4 years since I have been sober from love and sex addiction. 1,461 days! I still have the day tracker on my phone and to see that number when I remember so clearly seeing the number 0 on the day I stopped the madness is exhilarating!

Because I am now a certified alcohol and drug counselor, I see the devastating effects of addiction on a daily basis. I feel so grateful that I was able to remain sober particularly in the beginning when it felt nearly impossible. 

In the coming weeks, I will be celebrating another milestone--I will be completing graduate school and obtaining my masters in social work. Not only is this a monumental achievement, but remarkable given that I work more than full-time yet will be graduating with a 4.0. Tomorrow I will be starting the application process for my state licensure and plan to take that exam in January at which time I will officially be a LSW. 😊

Though I continue to be a work in progress, I have cultivated a strong and true relationship with myself over the past 4 years. While I don't know what the future holds, I know it will not be like my past.

I feel so blessed that I don't have to live that way anymore and that I have the self-respect and self-worth to never settle for less than I deserve! ❤

1400 days free of love and sex addiction!!!! 😊🥰🤩

This is my why

One Is Too Many And A Thousand Not Enough – Overcoming Addiction

One Is Too Many And A Thousand Not Enough – Overcoming Addiction

A new milestone.....and grief

Today marks 1300 days of sobriety from love and sex addiction. Although I am happy and proud of this achievement, it is somewhat bittersweet as well because of my overwhelming grief related to a loss I experienced just yesterday. 

I found out that my beloved 16 year old cat MotorMouth had either stomach or intestinal cancer. I made the heartbreaking decision to have him put to sleep to end his pain and suffering. It was by far one of the most painful decisions I have ever had to make. The emotional pain and heartbreak seems to be more than I can bear. This is made all the more difficult by the fact that I am feeling these feelings while sober. This is the first time I have ever done so and boy, does it hurt like a bitch.

However I will say that I feel as though I am honoring the memory of my precious best friend by being fully present for these feelings of grief and loss. My memories of him are all I have left therefore they are priceless. 

Rest in eternal peace, my dear sweet MoeMoe. I love you and will miss you desperately. 

1200 days!!! 😊

Today marks 1200 days of sobriety from love and sex addiction. On a related note, I will celebrate 31 months of sobriety from alcohol in 3 weeks. 

Honestly when I started this journey, I couldn't imagine that I would make it this far. People in the 12 Step programs will say that recovery is worth it and gets better as time goes on and that's certainly true in my experience as well!

I continue to do well in grad school and will graduate in December as scheduled. This semester, the class I am taking is Social Work with Substance Abuse and Other Addictive Disorders. Clearly I had advanced knowledge of the class material! Lol

I will keep this short and sweet but just wanted to post that I am doing well and still sober. If you are struggling with anything, remember don't give up! 😊