December Gratitude Post #28

Today I am grateful for the fact that I chose a blog topic this morning rather than this evening because I had a pretty awful day. In fact, it was one of the worst days that I have had in a long time. So instead of complaining about my day, I have decided to focus on the positive instead.
I had an epiphany during my morning run which not surprisingly is where I have most of mine. This was regarding the fantasy that I have always held regarding the "love" I always professed to have for my various qualifiers. This epiphany came when I was listening to the song Better Man. As I was analyzing the lyrics, not only did I think about how the men that I dated didn't ever truly love me, I also faced the bitter truth that I didn't truly love them either. This created a deep sense of discomfort for me because of course this is a perfect example of cognitive dissonance. It's one thing to learn the definition in a textbook and have a class discussion about it; it's quite another to live the reality of actually experiencing it. Man, the sense of discomfort that you feel is rather terrifying. I am so blessed that I was given the opportunity to realize the truth and stop living in that decades-old fantasy! Onward and upwards!