Powerlessness

Many people, myself included, do not like to admit we are powerless over anything. Not having any type of control over a situation is enough to make some people lose their minds.
However I realize for the first time in my entire life that I must admit powerlessness and give up all control. I must turn everything over to God. And I mean everything. This includes my love addiction, my food addiction, my co-parenting with my ex-husband (which even after 2 years of separation continues to disintegrate into a shit show), my health, my job, the health of my loved ones, and everything else that I can't think of but that I have absolutely no control over. Giving up control is scary but it is also extremely liberating and calming. Every time throughout the day that I need strength, I just pray.
On April 19, I am taking a trip to Buffalo with my dance friends for a clogging convention. This will be a trigger for me because my qualifier lives in Buffalo. I am hoping the urge won't be as strong 3 months from now but I will pray for strength that weekend and everyday leading up to it.